Not for the Light-Hearted.

Early tomorrow my mom will be having a hip replacement and this knowledge has left me feeling uneasy all day.  I do no fear for her life.  Hip replacements are basically routine but I do fear for the unknown pain.  My mom has suffered chronic hip pain most of my life.  Unlike many who chose to become stagnate in the face in physical pain, my mom has instead kept moving.  She kept running.  She kept playing tennis.  She kept working and volunteering.

A few months ago my mom came for a visit. She was tough but I watched her suffer silently.When the surgeon analyzed her MRI he said he had seen few pictures this dismal. I admire her strength in so many ways but it has also created a biases within me. Having witness my mom mentally fight through a war of pain my whole life I can barely stomach the gutless wonders who use it as an excuse.

Tomorrow my mom will emerge a bionic woman. A melon-sized peace of bone will be removed - replaced by metal and cement. I am in the same moment enthralled by medical science and appalled by the idea of some piece of my mother being foreign. And, I am scarred of the foreign look in her eye as she faces unknown pain through recovery.

On Tuesday JAC and I are flying to Texas to help out around the house. I will cook and clean. I will let the dogs out and help my mom learn how to walk again. I am so thankful I can help but some deep part of me had to go to Texas. I needed to witness the road to my new mom.

We are praying for something unfamiliar. We are praying that my mom will recover and live without pain. We are praying that she will not limp again. I am praying that through scars, ashen looks and therapy my mom will be made new.  I am asking for your prayers too.

My Night Off

I was at the end of my rope.  I can't say why exactly but I was really tired.  I felt like I was completely falling apart so when my good friends Becca and Kevin offered to take JAC for the night I jumped at the chance.  JAC had never spent the night away from family but I trusted Becca and Kevin.  JAC always loves them and they're really good with him.

I handed JAC off at three in the afternoon and almost immediately felt relieved but also a bit lonely. I called my mom and asked her what to do. She said, "Embrace the being alone." That is exactly what I did.

I read my favorite magazines without a kid begging for attention. I went to the fabric store and looked at every twice. I went to Target and looked at clothes and jewelry. I called my good friend Jenn and went out for Margaritas and chips.

My friend Jenn is a treat because she has an amazing repertoire of adult conversations. She knows a little bit about everything.  We talked about politics, religion, science and relationships. It helped me feel smart again.

I went to bed really early and it was fantastic. I slept in until 8:30 and for the first time in a month I woke up and didn't feel tired. I went on a run and didn't push the stroller.


When I finally picked up JAC after lunch he was tired and happy. He went to sleep only minutes after leaving the parking lot. I wasn't tired anymore. I well-rested and really thankful for my good friends.

On the Run

The temperatures are slowly dropping here in D.C. which means it is excellent running weather.  During the summer JAC and I typically run on the same  trail every day.  The trail is near our house so we can get started first thing in the morning before the oppressive heat takes over.  During the fall we can wait a little longer before hitting the trail and drive farther to try out new trails.  I'll write more about our favorite local trails in another post but today I wanted to mention a website I've found.  You can go to this  website and track your usual running route but also see routes charted by other runners.  This could really come in handy if you're new to the area or looking for something to spice up your daily running routine.  My favorite thing about this site is that it charts the elevation of your run route.   I love this feature because just about every day half way through my run I ask myself, "Is this route really uphill both ways?"  Its nice to see the truth charted out. www.walkjogrun.net

To keep things interesting for the non-runners I've decided to include a few weird tidbits from my day. First, this morning I re-used my coffee cup from yesterday. I had to spit out my coffee because apparently there was a dead fly in the cup. I nearly swallowed it. This incident totally ruined my morning coffee.

Second, Today JAC and I went to the International Book Festival. I collected my stashed spending money and promised JAC I would buy him a new book. It turns out there were no books at the festival. Instead there were authors reading books and hoards of people listening. Neither JAC nor I were into it so we trekked home instead.

Third, a few weeks ago we met a very nice stay-at-home dad and his son at the park. I thought we might see them again one day at the park. Today I was driving home from the book festival and saw the dad walking down the road. He was wearing a dress. I looked twice just to make sure. If we see them again at the park things could be awkward.

Friday Adventure

Today we went to the National Arboretum and it exceeded my every expectation.  I wish we would have checked this place out sooner because it was worth the trip.  First, the National Arboretum had free and abundant parking.  That is akin to discovering a unicorn in D.C.  Secondly, the National Arboretum is huge.  When I checked out the website I thought the Arboretum would be a quick stop with a few sad plants.  Instead the Arboretum features multiple gardens including a Bonsai garden and has acres of green space and trails.  We stayed for over two hours and I left wishing I could stay another four hours.

JAC's favorite part of the National Arboretum was the gigantic Koi pond. I found the huge fish a pit creepy but JAC was fascinated. My favorite part was the Capital Columns. These columns were once part of the Capital building but were removed when the building was expanded. They now make an interesting landscaping feature and a great place to take pictures.

JAC is getting to be so much fun. Every day it feels more like having a little buddy around. He trotted along the garden trails and seemed just as thrilled as I was. On the way home we turned the radio up really loud and pretended we were rock stars. It made the dead-stopped traffic feel less painful.

Skype

Jess now travels a good bit and we signed up for skype to stay in touch.  While JAC and I love chatting with Jess the advantages have spanned the whole family.  We now have a weekly skype date with my parents so they can keep in touch their only grandson.

Tonight was our best skype date yet. I grew up with a book called Little Fur Family and bought JAC a copy. Tonight my mom read her copy of the book while JAC sat in my lap listening and turning the pages of his own copy of Little Fur Family.

Inspired, my mom decided to show JAC all of the little furry creatures in her house. Her cat just had kittens and she brought three kittens for JAC to see through the computers. The kittens were adorable but meowing constantly. JAC immediately started meowing too! My dad told him they were called, "kitties." JAC started repeating, "kitty, kitty."

JAC has really gotten used to skype. When my dad comes on the computer JAC starts saying, "Papa, Papa." JAC will also give a "fist bump," to my dad through the computer without hesitation.

 I miss my parents. While skype is not as nice as seeing them in person it is the second best thing and one of the highlights of my week. I am so glad technology helps us all keep in touch.

A Broken Truck Day

Our trusty old truck only started with much prayer this morning so I called my mechanic and he advised me to bring it into the shop.  Our mechanic is named Jerry.  We go to church together and he loves JAC and JAC loves Jerry.  Jerry always takes great care of our vehicles and we appreciate it very much.

A park is adjacent to the shop and while we were stranded without our truck we took full advantage of it. We both climbed on the rock wall and JAC rolled around in the mulch. When Jerry told us the repairs would take a few hours we hoofed it to the mall.

The top floor of our mall houses an ice complex where the Capitals our local NHL team practice. JAC and I got front row seats to watch the team practice. JAC loved every minute of it and was only a little startled when players slammed into it glass only inches from our faces. JAC cheered and clapped.

I thought today would be a rotten day stranded without a car. Instead it was just the opposite. It was a fun filled day of park visits and hockey.

Light On, Light Off

JAC has learned how to use the light switch.  It is now his favorite hobby and he spends a good portion of his day turning our lights on and off.  He perches on the edge of our couch to reach our living room light switch.  When I put him to bed he jumps on his bed for hours so he can reach the switch and turn his bedroom lights on and off.  Now half of my daily shower is spent in the dark while JAC stands on the toilets and hits the lights shouting, "On!Off!" at the top of his lungs.

On the Run

Sometimes running can be exhausting.  Our 5 mile jog completely tired JAC out.

Problem Solving

One day JAC threw a screaming fit because he was unable to reach an object on our kitchen counter.  I thought this was the perfect opportunity to teach him some problem solving.  I calmly asked him to "think of other ways to solve the problem rather than crying."  I followed this instruction by demonstrating how to pull a chair over to the counter and climb up on it.  JAC learned the lesson quickly and now nothing is too high to reach to reach.  I frequently catch him dragging my kitchen chairs all over the house.  I think my problem solving lesson might have back fired.

Friday Adventure

I love junk store shopping.  I know many stores are labeled "antique stores," but mostly it's used junk.  I grew up junk store shopping with my mom.  She has a great eye for finding good stuff amidst mountains of junk.  Today I decided to introduce JAC to the hobby.  We drove out to Vienna, VA and met my favorite fellow adventurer Becca.  Becca loves JAC and JAC loves Becca.  Today when we dropped Becca off at her house JAC cried and cried about her departure.

Vienna's old main street has a row of quaint shops and junk stores.  I was proud of JAC because he generally followed my one finger rule.  When we go into stores with lots of interesting items I let him touch anything gently with only one finger.

Junk store shopping is an adventure because it is like a treasure hunt.  You never know what you'll find.  After some serious treasure hunting we stopped and played in the fountain and finished the day with a cupcake.  I couldn't have asked for a better day.

T

Ordinary

Destruction and sadness seem much more entertaining than happiness.  There is some secret allure to watching things fall apart.  It has an addicting quality. Some days I contemplate whether this phenomenon is created because people recognize something familiar in pain or is it instead the opposite.  While everyone will experience dark years of life few will be chosen for prolonged acute suffering.

The never-ending media stream of divorce, hunger, rape, pain and disaster only proves the national appetite for unhappiness. Still I wish the ordinary was spoken of more highly.

Yesterday was my husband's birthday and I can't help but think how the ordinary has gifted us happiness. We are two ordinary people. We live ordinary lives. After almost five years of marriage the ordinary seems worth savoring. The small pains once endured are not worth dwelling on. Instead, I love the daily pot of coffee waiting for me when I wake up. Jess always makes it on his way out the door. I love the that I never have to ask for the trash to be taken out. I love the way Jess proudly shows his co-workers the weekly pictures of JAC. I love taking our walk together every night.  I love his arm wrapped around my shoulder every Sunday at church.

While none of these things will ever make the nightly news they have served to create a very happy marriage.  I am so thankful for my ordinary life and I hope today you have a very ordinary day.

When I Fell in Love with Bob

Our first jogging stroller cost 40 dollars and was purchased used from Craig's List.  We put over 3,000 miles on that stroller and finally she gave up the ghost.  We decided to consolidate our child movement devices and purchase a stroller-bike trailer combination.  While this decision was based on the best of intentions it did not work out.

JAC hated the bike trailer/jogger and I hated it too. It was hard to maneuver and the handle would frequently fall off. It was prone to jerking wildly all over the trail any time JAC moved an inch. To me the worst offense was that the thing had a mind of its own. You couldn't navigate with just one hand. Instead both hands had to be on the trailer at all times or it was prone to falling off the trail. The necessity for two hand steering made it nearly impossible to reach a nice running pace.

I tried to endure the stupid jogging trailer because I'm cheap and didn't want to buy another stroller. Finally one day I casually mentioned buying a new jogging stroller and Jess jumped at the idea. It turns out he hated that jogging trailer too.

I suggested we stop by REI and test drive strollers. When could then purchase a used one from Craig's List. This turned out to be a big mistake. We tried out a stroller called BOB. BOB was amazing. It was super lite weight and could turn on a dime. It was also super expensive. It was so impressive Jess wanted to just buy it but I insisted we search for a used one first.

It turns out word is out about BOB. They resale better than a Mercedes and are snatched off of Craig's List in less than 5 minutes. BOB lovers are crazy. They even have a fan page on the internet.

After weeks of scouring the Internet for BOB I gave up. This weekend we bought a brand new BOB. I feel all warm and fuzzy just thinking about it. This stroller is awesome. All the neighbors have even stopped to admire it. Yesterday we ran six miles with JAC in BOB and barely broke stride. Jess and I even argue about who's turn it is to push BOB.  This all comes at the perfect time because the weather is lovely.  Its' running weather and JAC and I are off to the trail.

Neglect

I neglected the blog last week.  We had a busy Labor Day weekend and the following week I babysat my friends' kids.  Plus, I have been overcome by a dramatic urge to frequently proclaim, "Woe is me!"  I don't know why.  Don't hold it against me.

This weekend we hiked a portion of the Appalachian Trail and went to the drive-in movie. The movie was a virtual wresting match as I spent the duration tackling JAC, putting him in a sleeper hold and begging him to, "sit down and watch the movie!"

It was nearly 10 when the movie ended but JAC was  wide awake when we buckled him into his car-seat. He immediately started demanding his sippy cup which was of course empty and finally I completely lost it. I started throwing stuff and shouting, "Shut up, Shut up, Shut up, You Baby!" I'm not proud and I think my husband was completely stunned. I also think he finally understood that when I said I needed a break from our kid, I meant it. Sunday after church he listed the upcoming football games and then made an announcement. He and JAC would be watching football and I should stay out all afternoon. I did just that and it was awesome.

This is not a ploy for sympathy. Sometimes I get really tired of hearing about perfect things and I just want someone to say, "Occasionally, I totally loose it."

I saved the best part of the story for the end. My stunned husband never held my bad behavior against me. Instead he held my hand the whole way home. His grip was extra firm as if transmitting the message I really wanted to hear - "It's OK, we're in this together.

First Big Kayaking Trip

Kayaking is a big part of our family history.  The last day Jess and I spent together before he went to Iraq I asked him what fun thing he wanted to do for the day.  He said he wanted to go kayaking.  Unfortunately it was too early in the season to rent kayaks.  Instead we did something completely out of character.  We made a big impulse buy.  We went to the sporting goods store and purchased two kayaks, two paddles and two life vests.  We spent a the whole day kayaking.

Later when Jess returned from Iraq kayaking was a quiet way to reconnect but when JAC was born it drastically cut down on our kayaking. We have been waiting for JAC to get big enough to share in the kayaking fun. Yesterday we decided it was time. We put on his new red life vest and ventured onto the Potomac.

At first JAC was tentative and sat quietly between my knees. He quickly grew restless and kept reaching for the water. Eventually we paddled more quickly and he enjoyed the faster pace. After the first hour Jess offered to take JAC back to the shore while I paddled alone. JAC seemed relieved to be back on solid ground but as soon as he saw me paddle away he started shouting, "Ma!" He climbed into Jess' kayak and demanded to go back on the water.

JAC rode in Jess' kayak awhile and eventually we swapped again.  JAC spent the last hour standing in the front captaining my kayak. It was a fun day and we spent nearly 3.5 hours on the water. I was proud of JAC and I'm glad to finally share the sport I love with him.

DC United

Saturday night we took JAC to his first DC United game.  DC United is the local professional soccer team and I loved to go to the games while Jess was deployed to Iraq.  We bought cheap seats far from the fan section full of hooligans that I used to enjoy so much.  Our section was very family friendly.  I sat down in our seats, looked up and the craziest thing happened.  While Jess was in Iraq my friends Lance, Heather and Craig would go to the games with me.  I haven't seen Craig in almost 3 years.  Lance and Heather got married and moved to India but somehow coincidence would have it that they were sitting right behind us! It was great to see them again and it's always nice to have extra hands to wrangle JAC. The game was fun and JAC was a trooper. We stayed until the very end and he didn't complain once. 

Billy Goats

Saturday we hiked one of my favorite local trails.  One of the things I enjoy most about the D.C area is that despite living amidst 5 million people there is plenty of green space to enjoy.  The trail is aptly named the Billy Goat Trail because it is a rocky boulder covered path.  I was reticent to take JAC on the trail because I feared he was too little for all of the climbing.  My fears proved completely unfounded.  JAC loved every minute of the rocky trail and eagerly scaled boulders without hesitation.  JAC didn't want any help.  He wanted to climb on his own and he impressed our fellow hikers with his climbing abilities.  When we finally made it back to the car he looked like a little dust devil - covered head to toe in trail dirt.  The beautiful fall weather and the great scenery made for the perfect afternoon.

Float

I bought JAC a life Jacket.  I've been anticipating it's arrival all week and it was finally delivered late last night.  JAC walked into the living room and found it this morning.  Jess put it on him and JAC seemed to love it.  I'm hoping it this is a good sign because I can't wait for to take a few family kayaking trips.  Now I just need to convince JAC to sit still in the kayak. 

Friday Adventure!

Today Jess took the day off and we went to the zoo.  We both wished that we could have gone on a Labor Day trip but instead we're saving our money for our Balloon Fiesta Trip and having a stay-cation.  (I understand "stay-cation" is an over-used term but it does sound more glamorous than "sitting at home."

Here are a couple of pictures from our zoo trip. We've been there many times before but the zoo rarely disappoints. We have some other fun things planned for this weekend so stay posted.

Hard Work

I love my kid.  One of my favorite things about JAC is that he is down right industrious.  He doesn't enjoy most of his toys but he loves to help us work.  He has spent most of the morning following me around helping clean the house.  He will bring me the dust pan when I'm done sweeping.  He'll do a little sweeping himself.  He'll dump AJAX in the tub while I'm scrubbing and often help scrub with his own little brush or piece of paper towel.  Every day when we pull into the driveway he says, "dig, dig."  He wants to help us dig in our dirt garden and drags over every garden tool we own.  Our neighbors always look on skeptically as JAC drags the hoe around.  Once I even heard them quietly explain to their daughter that, "garden tools really aren't toys," but for JAC there is nothing he loves better.

Gosh Darn It!

My kid refuses to nap and I want to cry.  I need my kid to nap.  I need 1.5 hours of silence in my house every day.  I still lock him in his room for an hour to "rest" but I think he chooses not to embrace the literal translation of this word.  When I put JAC in his room to "rest" a wild loud ruckus follows. Ug...That's all I have to say about that.

There is not much going on around here this week. I really wish we had glamorous holiday weekend plans. I feel like taking an unplanned adventure. Hurricane Earl will likely hit the east coast this weekend. Here in DC we are only expecting wind but there is a secret part of me that wants to take the family to the beach and watch rain and enormous waves. This same part of me loves tornadoes.

Since I have nothing to say I'll leave you with a delicious recipe for ginger snaps. My husband swore he hated ginger snaps and then ate 12 of these so I think they're alright. I loved them. Let me know what you think.

4.5 cups flour
4 teaspoons ground ginger
2 teaspoons baking soda
1.5 teaspoons ground cinnamon
1 teaspoon ground cloves
1/2 teaspoon salt
1.5 cup shortening (not butter...crisco)
2 cups sugar
1/2 cup molasses
Mix these up. Roll in sugar. Bake at 350 degrees for 10 minutes. Cool and eat half a dozen with a cup of coffee or a glass of wine...or maybe a shot of tequila if you day was really rough.